Top 5 things I don't know

We've all seen those lists from parenting blogs...or links to magazine articles.
"Top Twenty Things Every Parent Should Teach Their Kids"
"Top 10 Things A Dad With Daughters Should Do"
"25 Things A Mom Can Teach Her Sons"

I've read them, and even found some of the tips insightful and helpful.
But I'm usually left with one thought...how do other parents know so much?

After a particularly large parenting fail on my part yesterday, I decided to put together my own parenting list.

And now, straight from the home office in Kaukauna, Wisconsin, I present

The Top 5 Things I Do Not Know

 1.  How to eat healthy.  

Does not super sizing on a trip through the drive-thru count?

2.  How to do laundry.  

I don't really mind doing laundry.  And after these many years as a stay-at-home parent, I've done A LOT of laundry.  But I don't really follow any rules.  Sort lights and darks, wash this in cold, that in warm, lay flat to dry....bah....it all goes in hot water together and then in the dryer.

3.  How to have a serious conversation with my kids.  

"Dad, why did Grandma have to get cancer?"
"Hey, want to hear a knock-knock joke?"

"Dad, did you hear about that school shooting?"
"Who wants ice cream?!?!?"

4.  Where all the money goes.

When my kids get out on their own and are looking for budgeting advice and techniques, we'll probably have to google it.

5.  How to be patient.

I used to think this was my strong point as a dad.  But it seems to be getting worse as time goes by.  Too often lately, I find myself just wanting the kids to be quiet...stop being so silly all the time (wonder where they learned that) and listen.

So there you go.  I'm not sure where all the people that make those other lists get their information, but my experience has taught me that I really have no advice to offer anyone.

New Title

I think it's time to give up on the Stay-at-home title for myself and this blog.

Now that I have a more regular work schedule, and two part-time jobs, I don't actually stay at home all that much anymore.

Let's brain storm some ideas....

Everyday adventures with a goofball.

What the heck am I doing?

Part-time Teller, Part-time Target, Full-time Dad.

Two kids, no clue

I welcome your suggestions.

:)

Chicken Pot, Chicken Pot, Chicken Pot Pie

Trying out a new recipe for chicken pot pie tonight...two thoughts come to mind:

- Back when I was living the bachelor life, I used to make a batch of Pillsbury Grands as my supper.  No side dish, no anything else...just the grands.  Good Stuff.

- I'm putting the odds on the kids actually eating this at about 6%.

Hold my fin.

My daughter turns 13 in a few days.  

That means two things:

1) I am old.  

2) She is getting older.

Another less obvious thing is that it means she will be old enough to have a facebook account.  We haven't let her yet because "the rules say you have to be 13."  But really, it's because I freak out at the thought of her out there in the vast internet waters.

I've often thought that Marlin from "Finding Nemo" was based on me:

My question for you (as parents, or as teenagers...you know which you are) is how much freedom do you give a 13 year old on Facebook?  I want to know her password so I can read every single word she posts or is said to or about her.  (that's now too much to ask....is it?) 

I've probably read one too many stories about online bullying.  

And it's not that I don't trust her...she's totally awesome and honest and respectful and innocent and awesome.....it's the rest of the ocean I don't trust.

Cross Country Angst

My daughter had just finished her run at the middle school cross country meet.  My wife and I were trying to find her among the swarm of people surrounding the finish area.  Then we spotted her, but we could tell even from a distance that something wasn't right.  Her body language and frown told us something was bothering her.

Was it an injury?
Disappointment in her performance?
Bad day at school?

Even as we congratulated her and gave her hugs, she fought back tears until she could explain.
It turns out she was concerned that she had run the wrong race route.  When the team did their pre-race route walk they had gone a lot further than what they ran.  My daughter had noticed a flag on the other side of the field, a flag they had walked past during the walk thru, but they had not run past it during the race.   She said she wanted to run to that flag, but nobody else had.  And now she felt like she cheated.  (Just as a side note here....she probably finished about 60th out of 100 girls.)

We could tell that she was not going to be able to let it go, so my wife took her to find a coach or official to talk to.  It turns out that he flag was in the wrong spot, they had run the correct route and everything was good.

I think I am more proud of her honesty than I would be if she had won the race.

My Daughter and my favorite Star Trek episode

Maybe it's because my daughter wants to be just like her mom.
Maybe it's because it takes me back to my college days.
Maybe it's because the story is about parenting.

Allison has been making her way through Star Trek: The Next Generation on Netflix...tonight we watched the episode "The Inner Light" and I cried like a baby.

"Seize the time. Live now. Make now always the most precious time. Now will never come again."

"I always believed that I didn't need children to complete my life. Now I couldn't imagine life without them."

The Sheet Dilema

Today is wash the kids' bed sheets day (honestly does not come around as often as it should...but that's another issue).  And it became much more emotional for me than I was expecting.

Took the sports themed sheets off my son's bed.  Asked him which set he wanted me to put on.

"I don't care," was all I could get from him....as I expected.

"Ok....I think we'll go with Transformers then," I said climbing into the closet to find new sheets.

"Really?"

"Star Wars?"  I asked.

"Uh...no."

I guess the soon to be eleven year old has out grown his fun little boy sheets.  
No more BumbleBee pillow case or Clone Trooper sheets.
And I haven't even tried using the Lightning McQueen set for a couple years.

 :(

We finally settled on putting the sports sheets back on after they're washed.

It may be time to do some shopping for some more grown up boy bedding.

Goodbye old friends.

Late at night....must turn off brain....

It's time to get another job.
I wish I had a different job.
If I get a different job, will I miss all of my kids activities?
What if I'm not home to get them off to school in the morning?
What if I'm not home to help with their homework every night?
I need a higher paying job.
I need to do something different.
I work with some cool people.
I'll apply for a few jobs, and see what happens.
Got a call about an interview....didn't go.   Too much like what I have now.  What's the point?
I don't like coming home from work after the kids are in bed.
If I get a full time job, does that mean this whole stay-at-home dad thing was a failure.
Or has it just run it's course.
I have no idea what I want to do when I grow up.
Got another interview.
I hope I get it....it would be a lot more money.
I'm not sure I'll like it.
Maybe they won't want me, then I don't have to decide.
I'd like the bigger pay checks.
I'd like to do something different.
What if I try it and don't like it.
Will the kids be all right home alone that much?
The kids don't need me home with them as much.
Maybe this job could lead to something better.
I wonder what Powerball is up to......

The Bat part 2

I know you've all been waiting for the update on my post about the bat we bought last winter.
(refresh your memory here.)


So today we took the bat down to the baseball field at the elementary school down the street.  I pitched a few to Andrew.  He had some decent hits.  He always wants me to try and get him out which is tough with no first baseman to catch my throw.

Then we played some catch and tried to tag an imaginary runner caught in between first and second.

Then he pitched a couple to me.

Then while running to the grass to get the ball (I totally crushed that inside fastball) he saw a butterfly, dropped his glove, and spent 15 minutes chasing it around the outfield.

It was all great!   :)

On a personal note, is it impressive or sad that I can remember all three of my hits from my one season of High School JV baseball?  I was just 3 for 18 that year and obviously should have gotten a lot more playing time!  Being on the field brought it back like it was yesterday.  That part of the morning was fun too.

Crying in church

Sang this in church this morning....cried.

I can't be the only parent that can't make it through this one...can I?

Plus, today is my birthday which made the "middle ages of your life" lines pretty powerful too.




"I was there to hear your borning cry,
I'll be there when you are old.
I rejoiced the day you were baptized,
to see your life unfold.
I was there when you were but a child,
with a faith to suit you well;
In a blaze of light you wandered off
to find where demons dwell."

"When you heard the wonder of the Word
I was there to cheer you on;
You were raised to praise the living Lord,
to whom you now belong.
If you find someone to share your time
and you join your hearts as one,
I'll be there to make your verses rhyme
from dusk 'till rising sun."

In the middle ages of your life,
not too old, no longer young,
I'll be there to guide you through the night,
complete what I've begun.
When the evening gently closes in,
and you shut your weary eyes,
I'll be there as I have always been
with just one more surprise."

"I was there to hear your borning cry,
I'll be there when you are old.
I rejoiced the day you were baptized,
to see your life unfold."

The soccer field is always greener....

I have two kids.  Each one is on a soccer team.  They are having very different experiences.....

My son's team has not lost.  In fact, most games we stop keeping score at halftime.  Last night they won 8-5 and that was by far the closest game they've had.

My daughter has been on the same team for a couple of years now.  They have won two games this year.  Which is a vast improvement over last summer....they lost every game last year by a combined score of about 77-0.  Then they lost every game during the winter indoor season.

My son does not really have any friends on his team.  He is often off by himself during warm ups or at halftime.

My daughter is friends with everybody on her team.  They are always having fun and genuinely seem to enjoy being together all the time.

My son is never excited to go to practices or games.

My daughter likes to go.

Last night, my daughter said she was jealous of my son's team.

That last one makes me a little sad.

Sleep Mode

It is becoming more and more obvious to me that without my wife, the rest of us would probably never leave the house....and most likely would not get out of our pjs all summer.  I have a lazy streak from here to Sheboygan and back...and the kids are quick to follow my lead.

Actual things my kids have said in the last 24 hours:

"Dad, before you go into sleep mode, can you look at this?"
"Dad, I think you should limit yourself to two naps a day."

The Door Into Summer

Summer vacation starts this week.
Way back when...when I started this stay-at-home-dad thing, I always had big plans for summer.
Weekly trips to the library.
Bike rides for ice cream.
Picnics at the park by the river.
Those plans more or less fell apart by the afternoon of the first day.

(side note on the title of this post: "The Door Into Summer" just might be my favorite Monkees song....I'll have to draw up a bracket and find out for sure some time.)

This summer, I have no big plans or daily activities planned.
Sure, both kids have soccer until the end of June.  And summer school classes four mornings a week during June and July.
(and I know I wrote about this another time, but WOW summer school is way cooler than it was back in my day.  My daughter is taking a photography class and movie making class.  And my son is taking a class called "Legos and Computers."  How cool is that???)

So that at least gets them out of the house.
But we're mostly just going to wing it.

And hopefully I'll get more hours at Target over the summer.  For the first time, I've told them I'm available some during the day and most nights over the summer.  Which means....gasp....the kids may stay home alone for a few hours somedays.  I know...that's harder for me to accept than for them.  I honestly don't think they would miss me much.  But I like to pretend they would notice that I'm gone.

Time For A Snack?

As Jon Bon Jovi sings in Wanted Dead Or Alive, "Sometimes when you're alone, all you do is eat."

Or something like that...

6:30 Oatmeal and Toast - there is really no reason for me to eat breakfast this early...but my kids are eating before they go to school, so I feel it is my parental duty to eat with them.

7:30 Bowl Of Froot Loops - (you know, I just noticed the other day it isn't "Fruit Loops"...why would they mess with my mind like that for so many years?)  The kids have left for school and it's more of a real breakfast time...so I eat again.

9:00 Toast - need something to fill the time before finding something to do for the day.

10:15  Taco Shell with Nutella - I know nutella is actually just chocolate frosting disguised as a breakfast spread....but I can't help myself.

11:00 Finally lunch time!   Schwan's Potstickers and Doritos.

12:15  Taco Shell with Nutella - really, this is a yummy snack.

2:15  Taco Shell with Nutella - I never said I was proud of these choices.

3:40 Pretzels - The kids are home from school...so why not have a snack with them?

What if it's not all about me?

A man stood on the porch of his house as the flood waters rose.  As his neighbors evacuated, they called out to him to join them, he called back, "The Lord will save me!"

A little later, a man in a jeep pulled up, the water now covering the front lawn.  "Get in, I'll get you to safety," the driver called to the man on his porch.  Again he answered, "The Lord will save me!"

About an hour later, the man had moved inside his house as the water was now covering the porch.  A man came by in a boat and shouted, "Get in, I'll get you to safety."  Again, the man answered, "The Lord will save me!"

As night fell, the man had climbed to his roof to stay out of the water.  A police helicopter hovered overhead and the pilot called down with his blow horn, "I'm going to lower a ladder to you.  Climb up and we'll get to safety."  For the last time, the man called back, "The Lord will save me!"  And he watched as the helicopter flew off to higher ground.

Through out the night the flood continued to rise, and the man eventually was drowned.

As he entered heaven, he was welcomed by Jesus.  Immediately, he started with the questions.  "Lord, why didn't you save me?  I waited for you to protect me from the flood?  What happened?

Jesus answered him, "Didn't you see your neighbors?  The jeep, or the boat, or the helicopter?  What more did you need?"


I don't know where I first heard that story.  Probably a children's sermon at church....but it has really stuck with me.  And recently it has taken on even more meaning for me.

Countless times in the past few years I have found myself offering this prayer:  "Lord, show me what I'm supposed to be doing.  Show me where I'm supposed to go and what I'm supposed to do.  Working part time at Target and sitting home waiting for the kids to come home from school can't be it.  There has to be more that I'm meant to do."

It varies a little bit from day to day...but you get the point.
Sometimes thoughts like "I'm too smart to be doing this" or "I deserve more" sneak into my prayers.

But what if I am exactly where I am supposed to be?  What if I am doing good for people that I don't see directly?  What if the time I spend with my kids is making them into the people they are supposed to be?  What if the people I work with at Target are some how benefiting in ways unseen to me from the work we do together?  What if is isn't about me and what I get out of it, but about me doing good for others (even if I can't see it)?

My kids may be like the neighbors in the story.
My time at Target is the jeep.
The people I interact with everyday could be the boat.
Situations and people that I may not even notice are the helicopter.

Things sent to "save" me.
I don't know what more I'm looking for, but maybe that's because I already have it.

I am not a teacher...I just play one on Monday nights

Last fall, I agreed to be a "table parent" in my son's Monday night Christian Education class.  (I still call it Sunday School...even though it's not on Sundays.)  That meant I would have to sit at a table with a handful of 5th graders and make sure they were paying attention, and staying on task during the class.  On about the second week of class, the teacher announced that she had a change in her work schedule and she would no loner be able to teach.  I had a chat with the pastor and said I could lead the class until they found a permanent replacement....and of course, that meant I became the permanent replacement.

I am not a teacher.  

Luckily the class came with a leader's guide to the lessons every week, so I mostly just had to follow right from a book.  Most night's I was just trying to fill the hour without things getting too much out of hand.

Tonight is the last class of the school year, and I find myself wondering if they will remember anything we did or talked about.  Were they just filling space and killing time....or were their brains engaged?  There were certainly times I wondered....for them and for me.

That group of boys that was always giggling to themselves.

Or the girls that seemed to be counting the minutes until they could check their phones for any missed text messages.

Did anything get through?

Someday when talking about God's grace, will they think back and say, "I remember Mr. Nathan explaining to us about God's Riches At Christ's Expense!"  (shout out to my Sunday School teacher from way back in the day Mark Shepp for teaching that to me!)

Or will the spontaneously break into a rousing chorus of "Father Abraham"?

Those (sort of creepy) videos applying old testament concepts to today's world...will they remember those (and have nightmares of the sock puppet serpent from the Garden of Eden episode)?

Will they remember that there is nothing they can do that will make God love them less (or more)?

Or are there things they will remember that I have forgotten....that to me were just time killer activities?

To my teacher friends....how do you deal with these end of the year questions?

I guess you've always got another year, so maybe it all kind of blends into one endless stream of young minds....but I don't have another year.  (unless something happens to the permanent teacher again next year, but let's not!)

And just for fun, here are the cupcakes I made for tonight's year end celebration!

Ending the year with  blue cupcakes....that's probably what they will remember.

Parent Handbook: Drama Chapter

If there was a parent handbook (wow...would that be a BIG book) there would most certainly be a chapter on handling middle school drama.  I may be wrong...and this may be stereotypical thinking on my part....but I'm pretty sure this will be a much bigger issue for my daughter than for my son.  With him, we're lucky to get the names of people he knows, let alone details about who said what and who is mad at whom.

My daughter was in tears today after school because two of her friends are mad at each other.  She didn't know what to do...they're each such good friends.
Helpless Dad said, "It will all work out."

Really?

That's the best I could do?

Need to find that handbook.

I can't imagine the heartbreak if it was actually my daughter in a fight with a friend.  But come on...how could anybody get in a fight with such a sweet little girl (Dad Blinders fully covering both eyes!)?

Somebody start sending me words of advice for when the first boyfriend situation ends badly.
Seriously....I'll keep them in a folder under my bed and pull them out when needed.

Grocery Superviser

Seriously.....I should not be allowed to go to the grocery store unsupervised.
Make a list and stick to it....how hard is that?

Picking Friends

Wouldn't it be so much easier if I could just go to school with my kids and pick their friends for them?  I'd just sit in the back of the class room and observe for a while, then watch a recess or two and then I could decide who my kids sit with at lunch, who they play with at recess, and who invites them over on the weekends.

I think that would make things much easier on everybody me.

Looking Back On The Song Tournament...

Funny what you think about while vacuuming.  And to be honest, I don't have as many examples of this as I should.  Especially when it comes to the carpet on the stairs to the basement...those guys don't feel the vacuum all that often.

Today, my thoughts turned to my song tournament.

Back in the mid to late 1980's I had a notebook with a carefully designed 16-page bracket for a tournament of 512 songs.  I spent hours  and hours listening and re-listening to each pair of songs, carefully judging one against the other and then moving the best one on the next line of the bracket.  (and remember, this was in the time before CDs, so the rewind button got quite a work out on the cassette player!)

So today as I was cleaning those stairs, for whatever reason, I was trying to remember the final four songs in the tournament....which I actually remembered quite quickly.  So then my thoughts turned to how those songs hold up today.......

#4: The Safety Dance - Men Without Hats

Still love this one....but to be honest, if I was having a tournament of only Men Without Hats songs, I'm not sure this one cracks the top 10.  Seriously, check out that band's entire catalog sometime.  Many great tunes.  This one made them famous, but it's really not one of their best.  And wow, what a weird video.

#3:  Jessie's Girl - Rick Springfield

That guitar intro on that one still does it for me.  But as is the case with Safety Dance, in a Rick Springfield song tournament, Jessie's Girl doesn't make the top 10.

A little proud parent note on this one.  When my 6th Grade daughter was asked to bring in a song for them to listen to and discuss at school she chose this one.  :)
(unfortunately the lyrics did not pass the teacher's pre-discussion test...something about the "loving him with that body" line and the whole idea of wanting to steal your friend's girl.  So she took in Don't Talk To Strangers instead....which still was cool, but that may be my least favorite Rick Springfield song ever.)

#2:  Love Somebody - Rick Springfield

This one would have a fighting chance if the tournament were held today.  One of my favorite air guitar  solos (which I played ferociously on the stairs with the extendable vacuum hose).   The lyrics may not be all that deep...but this is a fun one to crank up loud in the car.  The video is very weak....it would be a first round loser if this was a video tournament.  And remember "Hard To Hold"...the movie it's from...I didn't think so.

#1:  Shades Of Gray - The Monkees

Opposite of Love Somebody in that it has wonderful lyrics but really not the one you want to crank in the car.  Also has the best frech horn solo of any song in my collection.  I still love this song, but I'm not sure how much of that feeling is from the highly emotional episode of The Monkees tv show where Davy's grandfather wants Davy to leave the group and come back to England.  (just noticed the first clip doesn't include the french horn solo....but I'm leaving it for the emotional "Davy contemplates leaving the group" tie in.  The second clip has the awesome horn part.)

What's for supper?

She had been home from school for about 13 seconds when she said it.  

"Eww, do we have to have that for supper?"

It can't be mac-n-cheese, hot dogs, and pizza every night....can it?

Where does all the motivation go?

Days I work at Target:
"Boy, I really feel like exercising today. If I wasn't here, I think I'd do that P90X workout."
"I have such a great idea for a story.  If I wasn't here, I'd be writing that down."
"Maybe I should paint the living room.  If I wasn't here, I'd get started on that."

Days I don't work at Target:
"I'll bet I can beat my streak on Plants vs. Zombies Endless VaseBreaker today!"
"I wonder if there are any new Rick Springfield videos on YouTube."
"ZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzz"

Cross Country Ski Weekend

Fifteen years ago, the last weekend of January used to be a weekend that I feared.

I worked for a financial services company, in the I.T. department.  Our team supported the field agent compensation system.  Every Friday night, our programs calculated and payed commissions to thousands of people across the country.  Each week, one member of our team was "on-call" in case anything went wrong with the system.  If a program had an error, or data was incorrect, one of us would get a phone call in the middle of the night and we would need to get things fixed by morning.  I hated being on-call, but I worked with some pretty amazing people, who I knew were just a phone call away.  They could walk me through anything I couldn't figure out myself.

But on the last weekend of January, two of those amazing people, the two most important and helpful people, were not available.  Those two women would be in the north woods of Minnesota, in a cabin, and unreachable.  (Seems weird that there was a time when people could be unreachable....but this was before everyone had the internet in their pocket.)  They had an annual "girls only" trip to cross country ski, play cards, and relax.

I dreaded that weekend like no other, and I tried very hard to adjust the schedule so that my on-call week for the month did not fall on those days.

Several years later, my wife became very close friends with those two co-workers of mine.  In fact, they would be her co-workers too after she took a job at the same company...in the same I.T. department.  I had transferred to another area of the department and no longer had those stressful Friday night pay period runs.  But when my wife was invited to come along on the ski weekend, and I was left home alone with two toddlers....it was just as scary!  Who would feed us?  Or bath us?  Or make sure we went to bed on time?

So here we are, several years later again, and my wife just left for the ski weekend in northern Minnesota.  And you know what?  I'm not scared.

Not even a little nervous.

Sure, I'll get a little lonely, and we'll miss her.  But we'll also be ok.

Last year, we had a "camp out" in the living room.  The two kids, the dog, and I slept in out sleeping bags, and stayed up late watching movies.

Other years, we've attempted secret projects (like recovering the kitchen chairs) with varying levels of success while she was away.

We don't have anything planned for this weekend....just relaxing at home.

I hope my wife, and those friends of ours have a great time skiing and hanging out in the north woods all weekend.  I've got things covered here.

Stay-At-Home-Dad vs. The Tv: Round 2

I wrote last January about how I don't like to watch tv when I'm home by myself during the day.  How it feels like I've somehow given in if I watch tv.   And besides, there isn't anything good on anyway.

But now, there has been a development.   As I told my wife, we're so 2009.
Last week, we signed up for Netflix.

Now there is always something good on.
I can watch any episode of The Andy Giffith Show at the touch of a button!

Today, I spent an hour watching two episodes of How I Met Your Mother.  The two shows were from a couple years ago and deal with Marshall's dad dying.   I had read about them and wanted to see them, but never seemed to catch them on reruns.  That is a show I like to watch, but at the same time I don't like to watch.  It is an odd mix of inappropriate humor and emotional stories.  These two episodes made me cry like a baby, and cringe at some of the jokes that prevent me from watching when the kids are around.

My daughter has started watching the old Star Trek shows from the 60s.  She's up to season 1 episode  6.  She is embracing her Hertenstein family heritage.

Our tv landscape has changed...for the better?   We'll see.

I'm going to go watch more Spider-Man And His Amazing Friends.

Sick Day

My daughter stayed home from school today.  And luckily, the Ritz crackers and Sprite she had this morning have stayed down.  I don't know if I could have handled a repeat of last night (ewww....shuddering.....ewww).

She has been on the couch all day half sleeping and half watching HGTV....which is actually a little disappointing for me, I was hoping for a Disnel Channel or PBS Kids day.

This is her second day in the last two weeks missing some school due to illness.  I think that matches my total from High School.  I wasn't good at missing school.  I always felt like I was going to miss something and then be lost.  In fact we were just talking last night at supper about how I missed two weeks in 7th grade with the chicken pox - the last week of one quarter and the first week of the next quarter.  So I had to finish my Home Ec sewing project at home, and then start Industrial Arts a week after all the other kids.  I was telling her how much stress was involved in that for me... how all the other kids knew what they were doing and nobody really bothered to explain to me what to do.

(although getting to use my mom's sewing machine probably gave me a home field advantage in the sewing of the Chargers football helmet on my bag....so maybe it all evened out.)


In general I think my kids probably miss less school than the average kids due in no small part to my attitude toward missing school when I was young.  They'll wake up in the morning and tell me they don't feel good, and I ignore it.  Only if they bring it up multiple times will we get into a discussion about it....and then 99% of the time, I send them out the door.

Hero

When I first created this blog, it was going to be a place I would put stories I had written.  The first stories were about a stay-at-home-dad and his kids and their everyday adventures.  Those first few stories were very much based on my life and my kids...although none of them is actually true.

(if you are interested you can find them here:

Swimming Lessons

The Zoo

Bike Ride)

But as time went on, the blog evolved to be a place for my random thoughts, some relating to being a stay-at-home-dad and some not.  And some other stories that my kids had inspired, or helped create, or illustrated.

Looking over things on the computer today, I found another story I wrote a couple years ago.  It isn't really about a stay-at-home parent....or about being a dad....but I thought I'd stick it our here anyway.

It ended up being not quite as funny as I wanted...

HERO

The town of Hero, Wisconsin (population 701) is just like any other small town.  Well...not really.  You see, all the people living in Hero, (and even some of the pets) have super powers.  In downtown Hero you will find the same grocery stores, hardware stores, and barber shops as any other town.  But in Hero, Main Street also has stores like The Cape Cabana, Gadget-Mart, and The Mask Warehouse.  Instead of families going for walks or bike rides together, you can more often find families flying down to the corner store for ice cream.  Or taking the family rocket car out for a Sunday drive.

You might think that nobody in Hero ever needs help....but they do.  In a town full of superheros, whenever there is a lesson to learn, a class to teach, or an example to be given, Mr. Andrews, a hero of a different kind, is there.  He doesn’t wear a cape, or a fancy outfit, or have a colorful logo on his chest.  In fact, he is the only person in Hero ever seen wearing a suit and tie.  He doesn’t fly (at least no one has ever seen him fly) or have super muscle power.  But he always seems to be there when the people of Hero need him.  Nobody knows exactly where he comes from, or where he goes...they only know they’re happy to see him.

It was a bright sunny morning in Hero.  Nature Girl and Rope Boy were standing outside Gadget-Mart staring in the big front window.  The latest rocket boot accessory was on display.

“I wish I knew if we have enough money,” Nature Girl said.

Suddenly, as if from nowhere, he appeared.  Mr. Andrews stood next to Nature Girl.  “Can I help you figure that out?”

After a few minutes of learning how to count their collection of dollars, quarters, dimes and nickels, Nature Girl and Rope Boy were ready to go into the store.  Rope Boy gathered all of their money into his bag and turned around.

“Thanks Mr. And.....” But Mr. Andrews had vanished as quickly and as silently as he had appeared.

Over at the playground, Turtle Boy and the Pink Ninja were standing by the swing.

“But you already had a turn,” Turtle Boy was whining.

“You’ve had a turn too,” the Pink Ninja answered.  “I wish we could figure out whose turn it is.”

“Maybe we need a lesson in sharing,” a familiar friendly voice said from behind the slide.  Mr. Andrews stepped out of the shadows.

Pretty soon the Pink Ninja and Turtle Boy were laughing and singing as they took turns swinging and going down the slide.

“Wheee!” yelled Turtle Boy as he slid down the slide.  “Mr. Andrews, do you want a turn?”

“Where did he go?” the Pink Ninja said as she looked around.

They searched the playground but he was gone.

“I wonder where he goes.”

Weatherwoman stood outside the fence at the Hero community  swimming pool.  She watched the kids splashing and having fun.  She watched as they jumped from the spring board and went down the water slide.

“I wish I knew how to swim,” she said to herself.

“I could give you a few lessons,” Mr. Andrews said as he walked out of the locker room.

After convincing Weatherwoman to give it a try, and spending some time on the basics, she was ready to move from the kiddie pool to the big pool.  As she walked confidently to the water, she turned to thank Mr. Andrews.  But all she saw was the door to the locker room closing behind him.  

“Thank you!” she yelled toward him as she climbed down the steps and joined her friends in the pool.

As night falls on the little town of Hero, many superheros (young and old) are happier, they get along better, and they know a few more things than they did that morning thanks to a mysterious helpful and friendly hero.

I ran a marathon, I'm in great shape.....NOT!

I really need to get over this "I just ran a marathon...I'm in great shape!" mentality.

Two factors led me to the YMCA for a little workout this morning:

1.  It was weight watchers weigh-in day and I was very close to being up for the week.  So I needed a little last minute sweat to help me out.
2. I'm registered for the Door County Triathlon in July, so I'd better get back into some sort of a training mode.

I did 13 minutes on a stationary bike, after which I felt like my legs might fall off.

Then I ran for a total of 11 minutes on the YMCA track.  I may not be able to walk in the morning.

What happened?

Apparently three months of doing absolutely nothing wipes out all gains made training for and running a marathon.

5th Grade Band

My son began playing the trombone last summer.  Those first few weeks were a little tough on the ears, but he really has made good progress.  He has one lesson a week during the school day with other trombones.  And the entire band has an after school practice together once a week.  To me, that does not seem  like a huge time commitment.

But to him it does, apparently.  Last night he told me he didn't want to play trombone anymore.  It takes too much time.

My guess is that he would rather be home on the couch with his Ipod or playing minecraft on the computer....but really....one after school practice a week is too much time?

I think another part of it is that his trombone case is bigger than he is.  He does not enjoy carrying it to and from school.

So, my question is this...at what point do we give in and let him stop playing?
I'm certainly not there yet, but I don't want to be the parent that forces his kids to do things they don't like to do.  (flu shots and  dentist trips excluded)

How long do other parents force their kids to be in band (or choir, or soccer, or baseball, or drama club) even when the kids don't want to do it anymore.

Sometimes, I think if it were up to him, he'd never leave the house.


(Although I should add as a footnote, that I quit playing football after 7th grade in part because I liked to come home after school and watch the Brady Bunch on WTBS at 3:35....so maybe the apple does not fall far from the tree.)

Obviously this decision was not based on money

Cleaning out the basement this week, we (and by we, I mean my wife) decided we didn't need ALL the shoeboxes of tax documents, pay stubs, phone bills, etc. going back to 1994.  So I grudgingly brought several boxes up from the storage area to be shredded.  As I fed through the W2s and paycheck receipts, I couldn't help but fondly recall those first couple years of our marriage...two healthy incomes....poor spending habits.   Those were the days!

Obviously, the choice to stay home with the kids eight years ago was not based on money.  I think it was the right decision for us, and has overall been a very good thing.  But you wouldn't know that from comparing today's bank statement to the ones I'm feeding through the shredder.

Goals Update

We're 10 days into the new year.  Let's see....

Write - not so much happening here.  Still have a few ideas, nothing down on paper.  

Exercise - signed up for a triathlon in July, so I need to do something here.  Nothing yet.

Clean - Vacuumed today!  Woo-Hoo!

Figure out a plan for what to do with myself and the job situation - (crickets chirping)

The Bat

We bought some used cross country skis today for my wife and daughter at a fundraiser sale at our local YMCA.  My wife goes on an annual ski trip every winter, and my daughter has skied before and loved it, so we figured some inexpensive used skis would be a good investment in a fun hobby.  We did not find any poles or boots, so we also hit up the nearest "Play It Again Sports" store to finish outfitting the girls.

While my son and I waited for them to try on boots and find poles, he started checking out the baseball gear.  As you may or may not remember, my son has a checkered past with baseball.  The one year he played in an organized little league, he hated it.  He broke his arm that summer and was happy because it meant he wouldn't have to play baseball any more.  But he does like to play catch in our front yard, and occasionally will have me pitch to him on the field at the elementary school down the street.  So it's safe to say I didn't expect him to be impressed with any of the baseball stuff.

But soon he was wearing a fancy new batting helmet and watching kids in the batting cage.  After a while he came over to me (stationed on the bench guarding my wife's purse....like a good husband) and told me he had found a cool bat that he wanted to show me.

Now, I LOVE BASEBALL, so this actually excited me.  My son wants to buy a new bat.  Maybe I can sign him up for little league again.  Maybe he'll love it this time.  Maybe he'll be an all-star and play in High School and get a scholarship to college, or go right to the minor leagues......

"It spoke to me," he told me as he walked back to me with the bat.  "It needs some love."

So in a store filled with fancy brand new and some slightly used (but still fancy) aluminum bats,  he choose the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree bat.

"I don't think anybody else wants it, but I do."

As my wife said tonight as we talked about his purchase, "That boy has a big caring heart!"

He asked me why it was so cheap and got mad at me when I told him it was because it was broken and old.

I can't wait until next spring when we get our first nice day and we can walk down the street to the elementary school field and take some swings.

I just hope the bat survives.

What happens when I'm discovered?

In the not so distant future, my kids will probably get facebook accounts, and eventually that will lead them here.  What happens when they discover how clueless I really am?  They'll know I'm weak...it will be like sharks getting the scent of blood in the water.

2013 Begins

I've never been one to make resolutions...much less publish them...but this year I hope to do more blogging, but less pushing of my blog on the unsuspecting public via facebook.  So most of this will probably go unseen.  But that's ok.

I want to/plan to/should probably do more of these four things this year:

Write.  I have several ideas for more of stories, but I haven't gotten around to them.  The stories that my kids inspire, the stories that just come to me, just randomness.  Just write.

Exercise.  When I have something to shoot for, I do well.  When I don't, I don't.

Clean.  Would it kill me to run the vacuum a little more often?

Figure out a plan for what to do with myself and the job situation.  I don't know that I can really call myself a Stay-At-Home-Dad anymore as that implies my kids need me to stay home with them.

A little each day on those four things is the plan.  We'll see.