Cross Country Angst

My daughter had just finished her run at the middle school cross country meet.  My wife and I were trying to find her among the swarm of people surrounding the finish area.  Then we spotted her, but we could tell even from a distance that something wasn't right.  Her body language and frown told us something was bothering her.

Was it an injury?
Disappointment in her performance?
Bad day at school?

Even as we congratulated her and gave her hugs, she fought back tears until she could explain.
It turns out she was concerned that she had run the wrong race route.  When the team did their pre-race route walk they had gone a lot further than what they ran.  My daughter had noticed a flag on the other side of the field, a flag they had walked past during the walk thru, but they had not run past it during the race.   She said she wanted to run to that flag, but nobody else had.  And now she felt like she cheated.  (Just as a side note here....she probably finished about 60th out of 100 girls.)

We could tell that she was not going to be able to let it go, so my wife took her to find a coach or official to talk to.  It turns out that he flag was in the wrong spot, they had run the correct route and everything was good.

I think I am more proud of her honesty than I would be if she had won the race.

My Daughter and my favorite Star Trek episode

Maybe it's because my daughter wants to be just like her mom.
Maybe it's because it takes me back to my college days.
Maybe it's because the story is about parenting.

Allison has been making her way through Star Trek: The Next Generation on Netflix...tonight we watched the episode "The Inner Light" and I cried like a baby.

"Seize the time. Live now. Make now always the most precious time. Now will never come again."

"I always believed that I didn't need children to complete my life. Now I couldn't imagine life without them."

The Sheet Dilema

Today is wash the kids' bed sheets day (honestly does not come around as often as it should...but that's another issue).  And it became much more emotional for me than I was expecting.

Took the sports themed sheets off my son's bed.  Asked him which set he wanted me to put on.

"I don't care," was all I could get from him....as I expected.

"Ok....I think we'll go with Transformers then," I said climbing into the closet to find new sheets.

"Really?"

"Star Wars?"  I asked.

"Uh...no."

I guess the soon to be eleven year old has out grown his fun little boy sheets.  
No more BumbleBee pillow case or Clone Trooper sheets.
And I haven't even tried using the Lightning McQueen set for a couple years.

 :(

We finally settled on putting the sports sheets back on after they're washed.

It may be time to do some shopping for some more grown up boy bedding.

Goodbye old friends.

Late at night....must turn off brain....

It's time to get another job.
I wish I had a different job.
If I get a different job, will I miss all of my kids activities?
What if I'm not home to get them off to school in the morning?
What if I'm not home to help with their homework every night?
I need a higher paying job.
I need to do something different.
I work with some cool people.
I'll apply for a few jobs, and see what happens.
Got a call about an interview....didn't go.   Too much like what I have now.  What's the point?
I don't like coming home from work after the kids are in bed.
If I get a full time job, does that mean this whole stay-at-home dad thing was a failure.
Or has it just run it's course.
I have no idea what I want to do when I grow up.
Got another interview.
I hope I get it....it would be a lot more money.
I'm not sure I'll like it.
Maybe they won't want me, then I don't have to decide.
I'd like the bigger pay checks.
I'd like to do something different.
What if I try it and don't like it.
Will the kids be all right home alone that much?
The kids don't need me home with them as much.
Maybe this job could lead to something better.
I wonder what Powerball is up to......

The Bat part 2

I know you've all been waiting for the update on my post about the bat we bought last winter.
(refresh your memory here.)


So today we took the bat down to the baseball field at the elementary school down the street.  I pitched a few to Andrew.  He had some decent hits.  He always wants me to try and get him out which is tough with no first baseman to catch my throw.

Then we played some catch and tried to tag an imaginary runner caught in between first and second.

Then he pitched a couple to me.

Then while running to the grass to get the ball (I totally crushed that inside fastball) he saw a butterfly, dropped his glove, and spent 15 minutes chasing it around the outfield.

It was all great!   :)

On a personal note, is it impressive or sad that I can remember all three of my hits from my one season of High School JV baseball?  I was just 3 for 18 that year and obviously should have gotten a lot more playing time!  Being on the field brought it back like it was yesterday.  That part of the morning was fun too.

Crying in church

Sang this in church this morning....cried.

I can't be the only parent that can't make it through this one...can I?

Plus, today is my birthday which made the "middle ages of your life" lines pretty powerful too.




"I was there to hear your borning cry,
I'll be there when you are old.
I rejoiced the day you were baptized,
to see your life unfold.
I was there when you were but a child,
with a faith to suit you well;
In a blaze of light you wandered off
to find where demons dwell."

"When you heard the wonder of the Word
I was there to cheer you on;
You were raised to praise the living Lord,
to whom you now belong.
If you find someone to share your time
and you join your hearts as one,
I'll be there to make your verses rhyme
from dusk 'till rising sun."

In the middle ages of your life,
not too old, no longer young,
I'll be there to guide you through the night,
complete what I've begun.
When the evening gently closes in,
and you shut your weary eyes,
I'll be there as I have always been
with just one more surprise."

"I was there to hear your borning cry,
I'll be there when you are old.
I rejoiced the day you were baptized,
to see your life unfold."

The soccer field is always greener....

I have two kids.  Each one is on a soccer team.  They are having very different experiences.....

My son's team has not lost.  In fact, most games we stop keeping score at halftime.  Last night they won 8-5 and that was by far the closest game they've had.

My daughter has been on the same team for a couple of years now.  They have won two games this year.  Which is a vast improvement over last summer....they lost every game last year by a combined score of about 77-0.  Then they lost every game during the winter indoor season.

My son does not really have any friends on his team.  He is often off by himself during warm ups or at halftime.

My daughter is friends with everybody on her team.  They are always having fun and genuinely seem to enjoy being together all the time.

My son is never excited to go to practices or games.

My daughter likes to go.

Last night, my daughter said she was jealous of my son's team.

That last one makes me a little sad.